oatmeal:

This is our #kittyconvict project. More info here.

Please rebagel.

Do you like long haired atj or short haird atj?

okay truthfully i’ve given this question way more thought than it really deserves but i think i’m ready to present my answer

long haired atj is less man and more beast. long haired atj is the roughness of hozier with the soft touch of forest warrior. long haired atj would find you lost in the woods and show you the ways of the wilderness. long haired atj sleeps in trees and fights bears and considers the foxes and wolves his brothers. long haired atj is neither man nor god, but a soft and gentle combination of both. long haired atj can make fire with stones and tell you what berries are safe for consumption. you are SAFE with long haired atj.

i’m going with his comic con aesthetic when i think short hair because comic con atj was iconic. it was a lot. short haired atj is the gentlest dudebro. he’s the guy you’re not sure about until he opens his mouth and you realise he sounds about as threatening as alvin the chipmunk. he doesn’t fuck, he makes love. he is every comfortable yet stylish outfit you’ve ever worn. he is a glowing red sunrise on a rainy day. he is jeans and shirts and you know he respects you as a woman even as he takes you roughly on your Egyptian cotton sheets. he is the life of the party and the heart of the home. he’s the dude you accidentally call daddy in bed who never brings it up the next morning out of respect for your actual father. he is the lightness of boyhood with the security of manhood. he is a winner. he is the winner.

IF YOU EVER NEED SOMETHING TO READ READ THIS

chaoticallyprecise:

OK ARE YOU EVER IN NEED OF BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS BUT DON’T KNOW WHAT TO READ NEXT?

I present to you, straight from the internet, whichbook:

Here’s how it works: You click the link, and choose four categories and the extent to which these categories matter:

Then click “go” and it’ll come up with a number of books you might like.

DON’T LIKE THE CATEGORIES? NO PROBLEM – see this little thing:

THIS LITTLE THING WILL TAKE YOU TO THIS SLIGHTLY LARGER THING WHERE YOU CAN CHOOSE A BOOK BASED ON THE FOLLOWING:

YOU NOW HAVE NO EXCUSE TO NOT BE READING SOMETHING BECAUSE WHATEVER YOU WANT THIS SITE WILL COME UP WITH IT.

… Apart from bisexual retired alien dudes. No books on that. Yet.